A few moments to reflect....

It has been a hectic couple of weeks with appointments and chasing down paperwork and information, however, I have managed to eat well and get my workouts in. We still are without AC in the gym some 8 weeks later but I resigned myself to the fact that no matter what happens I have less than 2 months left in this area. I can handle anything for 2 months so whatever.

The entire situation with my oldest has been on my mind. I want him to grow up and stand on his own but I also want to protect him to make sure he does not make life altering mistakes that he will not be able to undo later. It can be very difficult to assist only so far but as Mom it is the best thing I can do...steer him in the right direction but let him walk his own path.

As I interact with the ladies of BuffMother more, I find myself feeling closer and closer to each of them in various ways. It is nice to have such a wonderful support group and be able to find encouragement from women going through the same or similar things. Michelle has created exactly what she set out to create...a safe haven for women to talk, find friendship, support, encouragement and laughter on their way through their daily lives as mothers as well as on their journey in fitness. Some are there to lose weight and get in shape, others to work towards a goal as a figure or fitness competitor and some, like myself, working towards a goal in bodybuilding. But no matter what the goals, there is always a friendly ear. It is amazing how personally attached to individuals you become with such daily interactions. You notice when someone is missing or someone is having a rough time. It is great to be able to jump into her Rally Room and just let your hair down, thoughts and ideas flow, emotions run loose or laughter over flow. She is continuing to realize her dream with BuffMother and doing an excellent and important job in helping others along her way. Ya just cannot help but love her to pieces.

On a military move note, I really should start getting off my butt and begin going through things and packing stuff. I have gone through some things and tossed some stuff but my goodness at the tons of stuff we have accumulated. Sheesh...I must make time to get on that.

Marriage is wonderful, hubby is fantastic and I am thankful every day I wake up and can spend it with him...I can only imagine how wonderful retirement is going to be in a few months. Scarey thought in some respects but also so long overdue for us to be able to experience it.

On my journey...I seem to be adding muscle and burning fat ... at the same time. So my scale is stuck at 131 but I see changes in my physique each day. Irritating really because I want to add more weight and mass...but all in time I guess.

Well life is good, family is good, love is great and friendships are fabulous.

Catching Up

Life comes with ups and downs which has been proven to me over the last couple of weeks. There are days when one's strength can be tested to its very limits. It is not up to us as individuals to be able to control all things that occur or the how and when they come to us...but our decisions once we are faced with them determines our inner character and true strength.

A friend/acquaintenance has just recently lost her mother and yet another is spending her final time with her father and affording each moment of the opportunity for those opportunities to make even more lasting memories. Myself, I have been faced with seeing the mortality of my own parents as their health issues became very prevalent in my life over the last week.

Having come to the realization that I cannot fix everything for everyone as I always have, has been a disheartening yet enlightening process. Life and time move on and so must I. So I will do the best I can to help my family when my help is necessary but I will continue to live my daily life with my future and goals in my mind and in the focal point.

Things with the military are moving and nearing completion which has been a long time coming. We stay busy each day with running around on the never-ending paperwork chase. But it is all coming together finally. Now we are scheduled for all of our retirement briefings and junk, doctor's appointments for myself and our daughter as well as all of his clearning medical appointments. So our days are busy busy for sure. During all of this, I still must find time to pack a house, prepare a move across country, arrange times for visits with various family members from coast to coast and get in our workouts each day. Thank goodness for the workouts or I think hubby and I would lose our minds.

September 20th is a long way off but yet so close. :) YAY!!!!!

Things are starting to move...finally!

Things are finally starting to move here with the Army. Dare I say that it is about time. Sheeesh. So we have a our final dates; Last day active duty 9/20, sign out and free to go 8/31. Now I have to pick up husband's orders next week and go to transportation to arrange for the moving of our household goods. Meanwhile, I am getting organized to begin going through stuff and getting rid of what I do not want or need so that I can begin packing. It always amazes me how much junk you accumulate (especially with kids) in a few short years.

Workouts have been good and eating good, just not enough. I am struggling to get it enough solid food during the day. I have always have the tendency to eat less once the heat gets up there and it has been hotter than blue blazes. So, I am adding more protein shakes into my diet to make sure I am getting the calories I need each day. Sheesh I really dislike the heat of summer when I am trying to eat 1800 - 2000 calories a day. I am keeping hydrated and that is the most important thing for sure. YAY!

This week I start my new workout schedule and am going back to a mixed body workout. I think It was working much better for me with much better results, to do heavy ~ medium ~ light days and varying the body parts. At least I saw better results. So we shall see.

Today is all legs YAY!!! I must admit that I do love leg day. We are now on week 7 with no AC in the damned gym...unbelievable. I cannot wait to go in today and see what the latest excuse is. For anyone who cares...NEVER waste your time or money on a GOLD'S GYM membership...they truly suck. The worst thing is, for such a large customer base and great reputation, their corporate offices obviously make no difference either because I have spoken with them, the district manager and the gym and get nothing but BS. So, needless to say that this is my first membership with Gold's and it will be my last.

Off to plan the weekend.

Interesting Discussion....

I frequent several online chat areas and forums and last night I was chatting with a woman who wanted to know why I am bodybuilding and lifting weights. She seems to think that women should be soft and round because well that is what women do. My opinion is that is a load of crap.

The female body is not only a work of art but an incredible piece of equipment that was hand crafted for flexibility and to have the ability to transform. We transform through puberty, through pregnancy and through middle age. Our ability to put our bodies through these things is a depiction of the true strength of a woman. So why should we look 'round and soft'? Because it is expected? That is so stone age.

So if you ask why I bodybuild...the answer is simple I want others to see what I feel about me...I am strong and I am a woman. Deal with it or don't it is your choice. It is my choice to display what I feel not what others think I should display. That is the great thing about humanity, we are each individual and we are free to make our own choices.

Have a great safe holiday weekend.

Friday Morning and all is well....

I admit I have been bad about keeping my blog up daily but things have been moving a mach II around here lately. We finally have an official date for our separation from the Army (9/20/06) so now we are rushing around with appointments, picking up paperwork, getting medical checks, discussing moving, packing, what we keep and what we toss and of course our workouts.

We have a couple things that are the "must do's" such as heading to Florida first and dropping off my son, going to Kentucky and visiting my in-laws, swinging through Kansas to visit hubby's grandmother, going through the NC mountains and visiting the rez before we head west. I want to see my friends and family before I headed across country, if it possible.

My workouts have been going great and I have been undergoing routine annual checks and having routine testing done so now I just wait for the results.

Through all of this, there is also a sense of loss. I think this stems from the feelings I have for hubby and his love of his job. I know he feels that loss and in turn, I feel it. But retiring is going to be great and give us so much more time together. We could have never hoped for so much time together while being in the military.

So onward and upward as they say. The focus...household organization, workouts, diet and retiring. YAY!

Catching up and the new challenge!

The new challenge begins today...the next three week focus will be the glutes. Goodness knows mine needs all the support and help it can get. *snicker*

Hubby is taking the challenge with me so we got our before pics and measurements done yesterday and we all ready to start.

The weekend was not a good one for workouts, I am having a horrid first couple of days of TOM and have spent most of the last two days in bed with a heating pad. Oh it can get so frustrating! But, I am ready to kick it into high gear. I will see how I am feeling today to determine if I will be working out tonight, but it is my plan to hit the gym hard later this evening.

Summer is here but in our house it is business as usual. As a homeschooling mom, it makes little difference on the summer months. It is nice and flexible for us because when we need to take some time off we do and we just go all year with her schoolwork or until she completes the year's curriculum. I really cannot wait to get moved to Washington and start trying to get settled in. It is going to be a great time and a fabulous learning experience for Cheyenne, she is looking forward to the move as well.

Well off to do breakfast and enjoy the quiet time of my morning before she wakes up. Maybe I will wake hubby up early so we can have a few minutes together before the house gets moving.

It is Tuesday....

Well we are week 3+ without Air Conditioning in the gym and I have spoken to the District Manager had smoke blown up my A$$ by him, emailed the corporate office and received no response yet and well I am very 'pissy' over the whole affair.

My blood pressure will not allow me to workout with the intensity that I want to with not only NO cool air in the gym but with NO fresh air whatsoever. The heat is an entirely separate issue. It really is becoming maddening to say the least.

My workouts are going well as are my eats. However in the hotter months it is much harder for me to eat a lot because I tend to eat less in the hot months. But I am focusing on and working on keeping my eats good.

BuffMother has issued the "Booty Challenge" which begins on June 19th and ends on July 7th. The focus for the next three weeks will be our Butts. Reshape, lift, bulk, build, fat bust and whatever we can do to them in three weeks of hard work and focus. So..on to a bigger better butt as they say.

Tonight is Back, Bis and abs. YAY! Last night was Chest, Tris and Forearms. I had a great workout just not as much as I wanted, as intense as I wanted or as heavy as I wanted. But good none the less.

Off to cook dinner and get ready to head to the gym later.

The weekend in review

The weekend went pretty good. Friday of course was my arm workout at the gym, so I worked the biceps and triceps to the point I did not want to pick up anything else heavier than my hair brush. Man did I feel that burn when I woke up Saturday morning. The crappy thing about the workout was that the AC at the gym was out. It was very uncomfortable in there and I over 2 litres of water while working out my arms.

Saturday was meg day...I love leg day. So I hit the sumo squats, plie squats with dumbbells, hack squats, incline leg presses and everything I could think of hitting that I had time for before the gym closed. OMG my quads were screaming on sunday. I had a difficult time going down stairs without whimpering on each step. Ya gotta love a good workout.

Sunday was my son's 22nd borthday and also my parents 46th wedding anniversary. So I called my parents to generally harrass them about putting up with each other so many years and had a great chat with them. We took my son out to dinner and I did something I have not done in about 6 years or so...I had a couple drinks. I ordered my son a Kahlua n cream also and he did not like it so I ended up drinking his. That is more than I have drank in 10 years. Dinner was excellent and we had a good time.

Today was a good day but much errand running and grocery shopping, which can be a depression event when feeding a small tribe. LOL. Tonight is Chest, Triceps and Forearms. So I am going to chill for a bit in a hot bath and then take off for the gym once the crowd thins a bit.

All in all...a good weekend. I will just be much happier when I am spending my weekends in the NW instead of here.

So sick and tired of the military's crap!

I am so ready to send a battalion of these little guys marching on the Physical Disability Agency and Fort Bragg! Well it seems that our lives are completely irrelevant to the morons who operate our military and the various moronic agencies involved. Finally, we get our decision from the PEB and get husband's disability rating for medical retirement and think 'YAY we are finally almost through' but not just NO but 'Oh Hell No'. We seem to be caught in either someone's worst nightmare or in the middle of a agency pissing contest. PEB says 40% and medical retirement for these injuries blah blah...the agency gets it for final approval and sends it back! Not because there is anything wrong with the rating, the findings, the medical records, the diagnosis but because they do not like the damned code used on the injury classification. I mean WTF? So again WE FRICKIN WAIT! When this is all over and I am free, I am going to write one of the most nasty, open, no holds barred TELL ALL stories or books about these morons so everyone in this country knows what assholes we have at large and in charge!

So what started as a stressful holiday weekend with my son's cat (more below) which then turned out okay, has ended up for crap! Mark my words on this, quote me, write it down, copy this post or whatever. When I am finally free from this and settled across country, may god and country help the first individual who dares try to tell me what I can and cannot do or make decisions affecting my life without my consent! I will beat them senseless with my own two hands! I have had enough of this shit...plain and simple!

Well the cat. A week ago Tuesday evening, my supposedly grown son takes off with some chickee without leaving contact info, itinerary and etc. with the exception of stating he 'should' be home Saturday night sometime. Here comes friday and his 14 year old cat starts acting really weird. This is a mean cat who has suddenly decided he can only lie around and sleep...and is lying everywhere with his head on his paws, clearly very unable to get comfortable and just not feeling right. So at 9 pm I have husband take a look at him and his response "I swear, I think he is dying". So off I run with the cat to the Emergency Vet Clinic to have him looked over. Once there, I am greeted with the news he has a urinary blockage, possibly kidney damage and will require extensive treatment and an estimated cost of $850.00. So, kitty stays, I come home and have no way to contact dear son about his cat. So I sit and make three times a day calls to the vet to check his progress, stew in my anger with son for his lack of responsibility and show of maturity and WAIT! So much for a holiday weekend of fun!

Long story short, he came home finally on MONDAY, he did not bleed, kitty is now home and son is scrabbling to pay us for what turned out to be a $643.00 vet bill. And then comes the latest Army crap. If I drank, I would need a stiff one right now.

Well that is all for now...that is enough.

Appointments and Stuff!

Military doctors can so 'bite' sometimes. They have attitudes announcing their officer status but displaying a lack of knowledge and bedside manner for sure. I went with hubby to the VA office on post and we began the paperwork for filing his VA claim. The VFW representative that we saw is a real sweet man, former marine who really is an advocate for the soldier. It is nice to have someone in your corner that is not on the side of the military for a change. This has been such a long hard road and battle to get them to take care of husband the way he deserves to be cared for and finally, someone else to fight for us as opposed to me fighting for him. I think I am going to enjoy this sitting back and letting someone else fight for a change. I think I need to send this kitty to visit a few of these military doctors. *snicker*

The princess is getting excited about moving to Washington state and spending the summer in the tipi. She thinks it will be so cool. She is also looking forward to gardening with Phoenix and learning all about planting stuff and making it grow. She really has an interest in gardening so she and Phoenix should have a fabulous time together outside.

I am looking forward to the trip down to see my family before the move. Once we get down there and deliver my son, we can relax for a bit and just spend time with my parents and then run across state and visit with my sister-in-law before heading northward to Kentucky to see the in-laws. We have so many people we need to see on our way across country that it may take us weeks to actually get there. LOL.

Well that is all for now, I shall post anything exciting that happens, which is not likely. I do hope everyone has a safe Memorial Day Weekend.